How to Stop Living in the Past

When we learn about narcissists and how they live in the past, we learn we don't want to live in the past but we must heal from trauma to stop going there. The ruminating phase is a normal part of healing and eventually we make it out of that phase so we don't keep living in the past with the narcissist. God is a forward moving God and we are to follow His lead!

But how do you fully stop living in the past when narcissists keep throwing it up in your face? We learn to not allow them to trigger us with our past mistakes that we have already been forgiven for and corrected by ignoring the narcissist's attempt at guilt-tripping. It helps to remind ourselves the narcissist is feeling guilty about something and is trying to project that guilt onto us by throwing a past mistake up in our face. Once you understand this, it gets easier to thwart that fiery dart! 

Now, how do you stop those reoccurring thoughts that try to trick you into living in the past? These types of thoughts are what occur during the ruminating phase over a narcissist but can also occur over many things from the past our autonomic nervous system (ANS) is trying to sort out. Being able to tell the difference between the two helps us stop those thoughts in their tracks; rumination over a narcissist - self-reminder its the narcissist; though from the past our ANS is sorting through - coddler your inner child and help overcome that thought with positive reinforcement. 

As stated in the newsletter, one of the most significant ways to stop living in the past is to start setting goals and reaching them, one by one and for every goal reached, set another one! With learning how to tell the difference between rumination and our ANS sorting through things it may seem overwhelming but it isn't and we can multi-task to learn how to set daily goals that will keep us motivated and moving forward. For additional motivation and encouragement, you can check out these messages from God! 

And keep it moving fellow warriors! Love and light, always.